A mother who never conceived
A mother who never conceived
Hi! I am a mother who never conceived. 5 years back after many visits to the gynecologist and undergoing various tests I was told that due to severe complications in my uterus I would never conceive. It was traumatic, this truth hit my emotions hard and tears never stopped. I was not ready to accept this and this led me to consult many other gynecologists but their answer were same, I wasn't biologically fit to conceive.Why me? I was depressed.
My fears,doubts and questions burgeoned. It was only god who could accept me and all the inner emotional battle. I raced to the temple! Standing in front of her idol with my joined hands I looked into the eyes of goddess mother. SHE DID NOT SPEAK.WHY WASN'T SHE SPEAKING? Tears did roll over my cheeks. If she wouldn't help me then who else will?
I started walking out of the temple premises and astonishingly felt a strong force resisting me from leaving the place, I was captivated and sat below a tree near the temple.I could see the the candle lit inside from the place where I sat. In my contemplation a question arised. What is the purpose of goddess mother Durga's birth?
Durga the supreme power took birth to defeat evil demons. She with her strength and courage defeated evil demons like Mahishasura and Rakhtabija. She fought for light, its eminence. I worship Durga, she is my god! Isn't god the truest and the purest form of the self? The bird on the branches of the tree under which I sat started chirping its melodious tunes and I was lost in thought.
What is motherhood? Why is Durga regarded as 'mother' goddess? I started arriving at answers. She gave birth to a 'universe' free of evil, she taught every particle in that universe that strength of character and purity of thought is what is all required to fight evil, she thus gave birth to the energy of life in that universe.
The bird sitting on the branch took flight and I could see it merging with the sunshine in the sky, understanding 'light'. I pleged that I would destroy all habits in my life that were destructive which included my short temper, habit of smoking, criticising and blamimg everyone for whatever happened in my life,EGO, being too casual about what all great things god had already given me and many more.
I walked into the temple again. I GAVE BIRTH. I GAVE BIRTH TO A STRONGER ME, WHO HAD MORE KNOWLEDGE OF THE POWERS WITHIN NOW. I GAVE BIRTH TO A LIGHT WHICH WOULD ALWAYS SHOW ME THE WAY IN TOUGH TIMES. I GAVE BIRTH TO AN EMOTION WHICH WOULD ALWAYS REMIND ME THAT IT IS THE TRUTH THAT DESTROYS THE EVIL AT THE END.I GAVE BIRTH, I WAS A MOTHER NOW.
Its been 5 years since that day. I have become more emotionally strong and I express gratitude to all the small things in my life. The characters which I gave birth to have GROWN MORE BEAUTIFUL...
Take care
A mother who never conceived
Hi! I am a mother who never conceived. 5 years back after many visits to the gynecologist and undergoing various tests I was told that due to severe complications in my uterus I would never conceive. It was traumatic, this truth hit my emotions hard and tears never stopped. I was not ready to accept this and this led me to consult many other gynecologists but their answer were same, I wasn't biologically fit to conceive.Why me? I was depressed.
My fears,doubts and questions burgeoned. It was only god who could accept me and all the inner emotional battle. I raced to the temple! Standing in front of her idol with my joined hands I looked into the eyes of goddess mother. SHE DID NOT SPEAK.WHY WASN'T SHE SPEAKING? Tears did roll over my cheeks. If she wouldn't help me then who else will?
I started walking out of the temple premises and astonishingly felt a strong force resisting me from leaving the place, I was captivated and sat below a tree near the temple.I could see the the candle lit inside from the place where I sat. In my contemplation a question arised. What is the purpose of goddess mother Durga's birth?
Durga the supreme power took birth to defeat evil demons. She with her strength and courage defeated evil demons like Mahishasura and Rakhtabija. She fought for light, its eminence. I worship Durga, she is my god! Isn't god the truest and the purest form of the self? The bird on the branches of the tree under which I sat started chirping its melodious tunes and I was lost in thought.
What is motherhood? Why is Durga regarded as 'mother' goddess? I started arriving at answers. She gave birth to a 'universe' free of evil, she taught every particle in that universe that strength of character and purity of thought is what is all required to fight evil, she thus gave birth to the energy of life in that universe.
The bird sitting on the branch took flight and I could see it merging with the sunshine in the sky, understanding 'light'. I pleged that I would destroy all habits in my life that were destructive which included my short temper, habit of smoking, criticising and blamimg everyone for whatever happened in my life,EGO, being too casual about what all great things god had already given me and many more.
I walked into the temple again. I GAVE BIRTH. I GAVE BIRTH TO A STRONGER ME, WHO HAD MORE KNOWLEDGE OF THE POWERS WITHIN NOW. I GAVE BIRTH TO A LIGHT WHICH WOULD ALWAYS SHOW ME THE WAY IN TOUGH TIMES. I GAVE BIRTH TO AN EMOTION WHICH WOULD ALWAYS REMIND ME THAT IT IS THE TRUTH THAT DESTROYS THE EVIL AT THE END.I GAVE BIRTH, I WAS A MOTHER NOW.
Its been 5 years since that day. I have become more emotionally strong and I express gratitude to all the small things in my life. The characters which I gave birth to have GROWN MORE BEAUTIFUL...
Take care
A mother who never conceived
Very motivational blog.i am really impressed by your writing skills.really appreciable.
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