Prasadam

Satviki. Satviki loved playing with her friends, Satviki also loved Ma Durga. She found Ma Durga for the first time in the village temple. The temple was an ancient one they said, the building made up of stones which had a pinkish and orangish tinge, the stones of the Vimana (tower) and the gopuram (dome) were beautifully carved into characters and scenes from the Hindu scriptures. The Shikhara (peak) was made of gold. The Garbha Griha (sanctum Sanctorum) was the place where Ma Durga’s Idol was majestically placed, it was divinely lit with diyas, Marigold flowers surrounding Ma’s idol, the place magically had the fragrance of sandalwood. Outside the Garbha Griha there was a Mandap where Prasadam (food that is offered to the goddess in the temple which is then shared among the devotees) was distributed in  afternoon and night.  Satviki and her friends would play outside the temple after school got over, then proceed to the temple for Ma’s darshan, enjoy the afternoon Prasadam which consisted of Puri and mashed potatoes, then resumed playing outside again till the evening. Ma Sharda would watch her from the Garbha Griha and smile.

There was something unique about the Prasadam. It was simple yet delicious. Puri made up of flour and the  fresh potatoes from the fields fried in minimal oil. Whatever maybe the intensity of the hunger of the devotee, the Prasadam would satiate it quite easily. Tired after hours of play, Satviki and her friends would have a feast, they would always ask for extra puris from the pujari ji incharge of distribution and he would happily give them the desired. With time as she grew up the hours of play reduced, and time spent at home studying increased. The same little girl with hair neatly braided was reaching puberty and very steadily maturing emotionally as well. She didn’t stop visiting the temple though, her relation with Ma Durga strengthened. Surprisingly she never missed the evening Prasadam distribution, in fact she herself took responsibilities to distribute the Prasadam to all the devotees. People have different means and ways of expressing love. For her this had transitioned into worshipping Ma Durga daily and then distributing the Prasadam, the purest form of love.

Satviki’s parents were labourers. They used to leave early morning from home, take a bus for the city, work tirelessly in the factory then return late at night. She knew very well why they were working so hard, it was for her own education. Thus even she put great efforts in her studies, she aimed for a scholarship. Life was tough yet there was Ma Durga to show her light. Who was Ma Durga though? What was her place in Satviki’s life? Ma Durga bloomed in every particle of the cosmos, yet she was beyond the cosmos. Ma Durga felt the pains of her devotee yet she was the one who made the devotee realise that pain was again an illusion . Ma Durga smiled when her devotee enjoyed the worldly pleasures yet she was also the one who showed her wrath only to bring the devotee’s feet on the ground. Still, at the end, Ma Durga was goddess mother, like a mother caressed her child, Ma Durga too caressed her devotee with the light of the ultimate truth, the consciousness of pristine rivers made up of her lullabies. Satviki was getting closer to the same mother, Ma Durga.

One fine day she had some arguement with her parents just before leaving for school, in her anger she didn’t eat her breakfast too. She was upset. Despite what had happened in the morning, she decided to shift her focus on work, there was an upcoming scholarship test for which she required some reference material. She made her way to the library to make some notes and then take reference from the required book. She searched the whole library for that single book the whole day and when she finally found it, the pages of the required chapters were missing in that book which appeared to be completely worn out. When she saw outside the window, the sun had set and it was already night. She felt terrible. There are times in our life, when we don’t understand what is happening around, things seem to be out of control, we begin feeling hopeless, lost. She quickly packed her bag and made her way to home. She saw the temple which was still open, Prasadam was being served. She decided to go home quickly then return with her father to the temple. To her shock her parents were not home yet. She understood within a few minutes- they were doing overtime that night. Her mind was filled with abhorrent emotions, how could she argue with her parents who were working so hard for her. With tears in her eyes, she rushed to the temple, the temple doors were closed.

As the winds blew, silence showered upon the whole village like terror. Satviki had not eaten anything from morning. She had experienced many emotions before but at this particular moment, she felt empty. She sat outside the temple door, near the stairs. Closing her eyes she chanted a name now. Ma Sharda. Ma Durga’ s name. The creator, the destroyer, the mother. As she contemplated on her name some divine force began to come in action. The temple Shikhara suddenly begun emanating golden fluorescence, which spread over the gopuram and the vimana. In the closed Garbha Griha, the small petals of the marigold flowers broke off and begun rising, the flames of the diyas begun rising too. The petals and the flames intermixed and very gradually took form, a huge lion, Ma Durga’s lion. The idol of Ma Durga took life and emanated the same fluorescence now, small fireflies revolving around her in a rhythmic motion. She stepped onto the lion. Such powerful was the state that as the lion took its first step, the door of the Garbha Griha opened on its own. It was followed by the main temple door. As the villagers slept, Ma Durga arrived on her lion outside the temple. Satviki was about to fall unconscious, when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned and her eyes were moist now, it was Ma Durga. Ma didn’t remove her hand from the shoulder of Satviki, in her other hand ma had held something, it was a plate made up of leaf, on it were Puris and mashed potatoes, the Prasadam.

Ma Durga wiped Satviki’s tears with one hand and with the other hand she fed her. Satviki was at a loss of words. Yes she was hungry, damn hungry! There was some magic in that Prasadam. As soon as the puris got over, the plate was filled once again with puris on its own. Satviki ate till satiety. Satviki seemed to be intoxicated, she was drowning in Ma Durga’s eyes. Ma then kept her hand on her head, her eyes widened now and she was alert to listen. Ma said-

“ There is nothing like good times or bad times kid. There is just time. If you search for my presence in this time, you shall realise that how it is not me existing in time, time is existing within me. Thus my strength is such that it transcends even time, conquers it, controls it and favours it for the righteous. If you sense darkness…call me just like you called me now, I may appear to be far but I’m really very very close, and even if I’m far I shall arrive really fast, you see my lion there”, as Satviki looked at the beautiful lion made up of the flames and petals, both shared a small laugh. Satviki fell on Ma’s feet and lost consciousness. The next morning Satviki woke up in her house. She went to her parents room to find them still sleeping after a hectic night duty. She gently hugged them. As her family woke up and began preparations for the days work and school, a few miles apart in the temple, Pujari ji began collecting the ingredients to make the Prasadam.